Unravelling and weaving, sometimes simultaneously

One Small Step

I make myself use the bathroom.
It is my bathroom, after all.
I find myself bracing every time,

but it is less and less.

I cleaned it myself
but there remains
an essence
that raises the hair
on my neck

I am not a practical person
but I can practically ignore it.

Sunday morning,
I took my first shower in there,
washed my hair.

I took my time.

I sat on the shower chair
and I let the hot water run over me,
feeling some of the fear run off me
with the soap.

This is not bravery.
This is survival.
This is how it is.

I am sure in the scheme of things
the streets full of knives and danger
the battle fronts and tenements
the precariously broken homes
my act is infinitesimal

In this place
in this time
in my heart
it is walking on the moon.

(c) RCGA 2014


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