Unravelling and weaving, sometimes simultaneously

Posts tagged ‘contemplation’

Rain Day

The humidity is high
a damp grey curtain
made of wool
that clings and weighs me down
each time I venture out

Yet the birds sing
repetitive echoes in the trees
and somewhere
a dog barks once
punctuation to the cicadas
and crickets
and small frogs calling
for rain to come

100_1173

(c) RCGA 2016

Advertisements

Dear Janet

Dear Janet:
Writing you on the other side
to say that
I wish I could lie on your table again
and have you tell me
the same thing
you did before:

Remember a time that you failed.

I was young then, Janet
I was so green and full of hubris
I did not want to fail
and had worked hard
not to ever be seen as a failure

Pride.
Pride in the spring
before the long summer
Pride when the flowers blossom
ignoring the inevitability
of the petals falling away

Yes, I have failed, Janet
many times now
I have fallen and gotten up
over and over
as the weight of experience and years
piled onto my shoulders
and I chose a rocky path
or tripped on my own feet

The buds crested,
their full perfume a memory now
but there has been fruit
something to sustain me in the harvest
and hopefully, Janet
the seeds I preserve
will weather the winter
so I can share them
before I am part of the loam.

I am learning, Janet
I am learning that failure
as you said
means I am reaching farther
than the safety
of trying to be perfect
I am trying harder
to grow.

(c) RCGA 2016

This is my 200th post here.

For Janet Mentgen, RN and Healing Touch mentor, who passed in 2005.

Healing-Touch-Janet M

Crazing

The goal is for
both form and surface
to heat and cool
at the same rate
to grow and retract
in seamless
melding motion
creating a smooth bond

Life is more like raku
in application

adjustments coming
rapidly
and unexpectedly
small cracks
sending quiet pings
rippling around us
disturbing
with the sound of fracture
skins both thin and thick

(the irony is that if glaze is applied
too thickly
it enhances the crazing…
so the thicker the skin
the bigger the cracks
and there’s no escape
from that flaw
once it’s fired into place)

Rivers of seams
fractal out from our growth spurts
visual reminders
that change comes
and leaves its mark
when we grow too fast
for our skin to adjust

There is no polishing them away
and yet
we can delight in it
take deliberate pleasure
in both subtle and garish fissures
displaying our age
and experience
in such a visual way
no one can mistake them
for anything
but battle scars

No dismissive critic
drawling insults of our crazing
can understand our depth
and strength
or provenance

(c) RCGA 2016
Crazing is a spider web pattern of cracks penetrating the glaze. It is caused by tensile stresses greater than the glaze is able to withstand. ~”Ceramic Glaze Technology”

glass-pattern-blue-lakesidepottery

Lakeside Pottery: Blue Glaze

The Man with the Long Tale

To the 48 y/o sapiosexual WM
from Arkansas
who I messaged late one night
and asked
for a story:

Thank you for responding.

In the midst of
your rambling
dangling tale
of Alice
her looking glass
fishnets
Dr. Pepper
and quarters for laundry

I wondered if
this was how
Scheherazade
kept a good head
on her shoulders

if she worked on a riff
or just had a good memory

if the gift of storytelling
is more about confabulation
in the long run

than it is about
what’s really happening

If what the sultan wanted
was just to be astounded
for a while
and have something else
to chase
in his dreams
besides his ghostly harem

(c) RCGA 2015

Shiny

I told you
that I am philosophical
about desire

There are many things
that I have wanted
that I will never have

and there are also
many people
I could say the same thing
about

I have never
been spoiled
by the universe
into believing
I will get
everything
just by wishing for it

or that some things
will even be mine
after pining
and urgent toil

That is…
okay

No
it’s really not

But it teaches me
something
about myself
and the nature
of my desires
it teaches me
something
about the objects
of my desires
it teaches me
not to rely
on my desires

because they often
only reflect
a twinkling urge
rather than
a glowing need

and everyone knows
those stars we see
are not there
anymore
no matter that
we wish upon them
sparkling
unreachable
shiny

(c) RCGA 2015

Midnight Philosophy

Sitting in the screen glow
Kava brewing on the counter
waiting for your reply

Will your words be philosophical
or filthy
will the connection
always cerebral
float from one center to the next
an uneasy nexus
root to belly
heart to mind
back again

What is evolution

are we creating ourselves
or each other
by building up images
and wishful thoughts
clay of flesh
and blood of pixels
breath coming
from the exchange of words
and being stolen
by the intensity
of eyes joining
through a mechanical vector

Our animals speak
with the voices of gods

We have limited control
of the fractals of existence
only the portion
we can mediate in the moment

What would you like to happen

Where do you want to go

Is it already manifesting
and transmitting
from your retinas to mine
beyond consciousness
in a place
too deep to think any longer
without discomfort

My tea is done

I stir in the honey
and avoid your eyes

(c) RCGA 2015

man-staring-at-computer

Pyrophobia

We’re playing with matches
I whisper
and you ask
What do you mean

Oh

I can see this
spooling out
as if I am watching it
from some surreal perch
far above
a bird perhaps
or a ghost

or what I am
a survivor
of a previous fire
with memories and scars

We are both
in a dry spell
I say
carefully
We are brittle
and exposed
eager as kindling
and full of sap
as fatwood

I agree
you respond
that you make my heart pine
but before you go on
with your analogy
of lucifers
and ashes
I would like
to make an argument
for the fire
itself

I would suggest
you say
gently
that neither one of us
are children
and the element of fire
is a good and glorious thing

but you know that

Didn’t you tell me
stories of fire tending
stories of camp fires
stories of fireplaces
stories of wood stoves
stories of bonfires
stories of fire pits

So

why should our story
be a house burning down
or the razing of a forest

why can’t our story
be two people
who are full of
goodness and glory
creating a space
to be warm
and maybe
throwing a few sparks
against the stars

Congregation
rather than
Conflagration

(c) RCGA 2015

match

The Boiler

a journal of new literature

Surviving Grief

How to embrace grief and heal

unbolt me

the literary asylum

Tales of haunted hotel floors and faraway myths

Some of my short stories, draft ideas and everyday tautologies.

Kosmogonic

Submitting to the Glorious Inevitable

Arrows & Metaphors

M. Sanchez Cayuso

Inwardly Digest

Reflections and thoughts on faith, life, and the Christian Tradition

Mohn Foto

Photography

SCAeveryday

Society for Creative Anachronism Every Day of Your Life!

Ranger Medic Nurd

Thoughts of a Park Ranger turned EMS about nurdy cool stuff!

Natchitoches Parish Journal

News, Sports and Information for Natchitoches Parish

rivrvlogr

Looking ahead, without looking back (too often)

Michael Cargill

Regular updates of sarcastic and irreverent nonsense.

writerchristophfischer

Books, Reviews and bookish thoughts

MyGreedyLove

Dating, Sex, Rants, Relationships, Non-monogamy and Random Shenanigans

eBayism School of Thought

AWAKENING THE SLEEPING READERS

%d bloggers like this: